Lady B Essentials

As I sat alone crying, praying for comfort, praying for someone to give me a hug, but knowing I wouldn’t readily accept it, I held my pillow tight. There was no trust, everyone was against me, whispered my anxiety and paranoia. They wouldn’t believe me, they wouldn’t understand; another one fallen victim to his charm, to this man.

As I sit and look at the title, I am overwhelmed with emotions: anger, sadness, disbelief, and a whole lotta truth. I let them define my worth. I allowed them to take control over my life. How? Why?

Hello Ladies! As you may have heard, if you follow my Instagram, I am doing a series called Because They...

1. Practice

This may seem weird or even sad that anyone has to practice saying no, but it really is more difficult to do for some people. If you are like me, I have a hard time saying no, and an even harder time saying no without a reason or an excuse. Until recently, I did not even think that was a possibility. I could actually say no and not have to explain myself? No way. Well, it is possible.

1. Make a List.

Yes, you heard me right. It is time for the good ole’ list. Making a list(s) can really help you organize all your thoughts. For me, my thoughts are all-consuming especially when I need to make an important decision. I feel overwhelmed, and the more I think of things, the more I feel lost and overanalyze. But the more I don’t think about it, I feel as though I am putting off the decision. It causes even more anxiety. So, I feel like I can’t make the decision, and I end up being unproductive and hard on myself. 

1. Educate via your experiences/story.

Education is key to explaining mental illness to your loved ones. The key is to figure out/feel out each one and see the best way to discuss it. And yes, I know that loved ones should come to you like they would if you were diagnosed with a physical disease. But the reality is, for most people, the stigma is strong in their head. They may not know what to say, and unfortunately, compassion and common sense tend to fly out the door as separation comes to the forefront.

1. I said NO and I didn’t feel guilty.